Life as a fanatic was difficult.
Because I had learned at the conference that two full hours of decrees every
morning was an absolute must, I had to get up very early every day to get them
all in before I went to work. The rest of my waking hours (more
accurately, my "try-to-stay-awake" hours), I perpetually muttered a
decree, mantra or call of some sort.
Another challenge my fanatic life presented was
diet. Back then there wasn’t the glut of vegetarian restaurants, recipes
and health food stores that there are today.
I drove all over the city of
Denver looking for bread without sugar. I was hungry most of the time
because I did not know how to eat properly as a vegetarian. Beef and fowl
were out of the question and God forbid that I should eat any fish! <G>
(Those peanut butter and graham crackers were looking good—but they had
sugar.)
Of course, my wardrobe was totally unacceptable.
Most of my clothes had black or other forbidden colors in them. Had to fix
that!
Then there was the survival issue. As
disaster seemed imminent and I would be using most of my funds to attend AMU, I
got a loan from my credit union to buy all the best survival gear I could
find—Kelty’s top-of-the-line backpack, a sleeping bag good to at least sixty
below zero, hiking boots, tent, provisions, etc.
I tried to explain the very real threat of
cataclysm to my mom. She did not understand the urgency of the moment,
though. I wished she had come to the conference with me. I thought
then she would have understood.
I tried to talk her into selling her
house, buying gold and survival gear and moving to Idaho. She didn’t say
much and let it drop. She kept her house, did not invest in survival gear
or gold and the closest she got to Idaho was eating baked potatoes.
I went ahead with my preparations. I was
still a little short on funds for attending AMU, though. I sold my
ten speed and I realized I had to hock my two saddles. One was especially
beautiful. Even though I felt that there was no longer any room in my life
for frivolous activities such as riding my horse, I could not bring myself to
sell him. I loved him too much.
At some point during that summer, my mom and I
drove to Colorado Springs to go to a service at TSL headquarters called La
Tourelle. I think it was a Saturday morning Kuan Yin Jubilee
Service.
There was hardly anyone there for the service.
And who do you think led the service? Peter Arnone. I remember how
clean-cut and proper Peter was. He was intense and impersonal like the
staff I had met at the conference. He led the decrees at a very slow pace.
I think he spoke to us briefly after the service and we went home. I
don’t remember much about that visit except how impressed I was with the big
beautiful mansion one block away from the Broadmoor Hotel.
There was so much to do before AMU in September!
I was in the midst of putting a roof on my mom’s house by myself and had to
make sure I completed it before I left.
In addition to completing the roof and working full time,
I had to do my daily decrees, study my Keepers lessons and Pearls, listen
to dictations, shop for bread (<G>), survival gear and a new wardrobe and
get ready to depart for Santa Barbara.
I put myself on a strict schedule
that began at 3 a.m. and was timed down to the minute from morning ‘til night.
It makes me tired to write about it!
Living with a fanatic must have been a trial for
my mom. One day she came to the bottom of the stairs up to my room and
said, "Honey, you seem so intense!" I didn’t think I was being
intense at all. I was dedicated to helping save the world from the pending
cataclysm. My mom was bewildered. She didn’t say any more about my
intensity (i.e. fanaticism).
Towards the end of the summer, I received a
packet of information for AMU. It included a Code of Conduct.
The code by today’s standards is strict but it didn’t seem so at the time.
I had never done drugs. I didn’t drink or live a wild life. Living
up to the code did not require major changes in my lifestyle.
In the
packet, there was a specific daily decree assignment for me personally based on
a reading that the messenger had done on my aura. I dutifully added
those decrees to my morning session.
The information packet also outlined the plan for
AMU. There were to be five levels of twelve-week sessions. Between
each level, one would leave AMU for a three-month period called a
"co-op." I looked forward to attending all five levels.
As the beginning of September drew nigh, it was
time to give notice at work. I requested a leave of absence so that I
could step back into my job when I returned during the co-op period. My
supervisor asked what I was going to be doing. I told her I was going to
attend Ascended Master University. (Don’t laugh. I really had to
reveal the name of the school as part of the application.) The boss
rejected my request for a leave. I had to quit and forfeit my seniority.
My last day of work was a Friday. I was
booked to fly to Santa Barbara on Sunday. On Saturday, I received a Summit
Beacon newspaper from TSL in the mail. There was a big article about the
opening of AMU. I was reading the article and it said that when one
completed all five levels of AMU he/she could be ordained a MINISTER! A
minister!? I was stunned. Being a minister was the furthest thing
from my mind. No way! I considered canceling everything. I was
really bummed and in a quandary.
I don’t remember if I called TSL in Santa
Barbara or they called me, but I spoke to N.J. on the
phone. She was gracious and excited about the opening of AMU. I
didn’t voice my most recent concern to her about being a minister.
I
asked her how many people would be at AMU. She enthusiastically replied,
"Seventy!" I said, "Seventy?" I was shocked!
Here was the opportunity to sit at the feet of the Vicar of Christ on Earth, the
real pope, the messenger of the Great White Brotherhood and only seventy people signed up?! I
fully expected that there would be at least two thousand there. It seemed
to me that everyone who had been at the July conference and heard of the opening
of AMU would be there along with hundreds more.
As I had quit my job and finished the roof and
bought a plane ticket and made all the preparations to go, I decided to proceed
with my plans. I would worry about the minister thing later.
I flew to Santa Barbara with much anticipation.
I thought that AMU would be a three-month conference. I didn’t even
bring any notebooks to write in. I would decree and absorb the radiation
of dictations and lectures all day long from the messenger in person, just like
the conference. For some reason, the idea of taking notes did not occur to
me.
When I arrived at the Motherhouse in Santa
Barbara, N.J. came out and vigorously shook my hand and made me
feel welcome. She was very friendly. At registration, I found out
that AMU was going to be academic. There were notebooks, pens and
textbooks for sale. I purchased supplies and all the required books.
At the end of the day, we were all bussed to our living quarters in Goleta near
UC Santa Barbara. It was about a half hour ride from the Motherhouse.
I thought the dorms were quite nice. They were located about three blocks
from the beach.
Home Part
Three